Avery Edison's Internet Diary

I use facebook.com to make friends.

I don’t know much, but I know this: if you are putting on a comedy show and it is going badly then you should put me on stage and for the seven-to-ten minutes I am on that stage it will be a good comedy show.

(No big deal, but I’ve had a couple of really good sets lately -after not doing stand-up for a while, too- and gotten some very high praise from some people I respect, and it’s all gone to my head and I’m walking around my apartment telling my girlfriend that she’s lucky she gets to live with a Comedy Messiah. And I’m half-joking, but half-not.)

(And the thing is that I’ve been to a lot of comedy shows, and I’ve seen a lot of bad comedians, and a lot of good-comedians-who-are-having-a-bad-night-and-take-it-out-on-the-audience, and I have had enough of that, you hear? Because all you have to do to have a good show is 1) be amazing and 2) treat the audience like they are amazing. None of this “why aren’t there more of you here, you assholes?” or “uhhh, that’s joke’s new, you don’t get it.” NO. FUCK YOU. JUST BE AMAZING. IT’S NOT HARD.)

(My fundamental, A1-message to all comics is you can will a good show into being. All you have to do is be your best, act like you’re performing for a thousand people who have all paid money to see you-and-only-you, and you will have the set of your life every time.)

(Oh, also, take the time to learn your material and practice at home. I swear, notebooks only belong on stage if you’re Steven Wright.)

(Yeah, give me 15 minutes of stage time spread out over a week, and suddenly I know everything about comedy. WELL the joke is on you because I already knew everything about comedy, it just took the mild self-esteem boost of performing to bring it out.)

*Mic drop, except not really because that damages the mic, assholes. Please have some respect for the establishment and your fellow comics.*

Watching Louis CK’s latest special makes me so happy as a feminist. FINALLY a straight white man is saying super obvious stuff about women, and doing so in a paternalistic manner that denies them any sexual agency or desire.

Bonus points for the gay voice that “is not a gay voice”.

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deanofcondos:

bitchsalad:

IN TWO WEEKS!!!

Tickets HERE - http://www.ticketscene.ca/events/8336

yall are lookin pretty fine

Oh no big deal but that’s me on that poster and I’m super excited for this show.

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File under: tag lines that also work for your life in general.

Sometimes I feel like women should not be allowed to wear the hijab, because the only reason they would want to is because they’ve been primed by a woman-hating culture to think it is appropriate, and wearing it just re-inforces that culture’s power. Then I shave my legs, put on make-up, and plan an outfit just to go to the store.

We should all be allowed to indulge in our own culture’s tools of oppression, I guess.

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I’m really sick right now, and taking solace in one of my favorite things of all time.

The Maniacal Rage Podcast, née The Garrett Murray Podcast, was the first podcast I ever listened to, all the way back in April 2006. Seven years later, I’ve transferred every episode from old computers to new, onto iPods and iPhones. This show was such a huge part of the molding of my comedy sensibility (ugh such a stupid thing to say), and I’m so glad that it returned last week, after a looooong hiatus, giving me an excuse to go through all the episodes all over again as I lay in bed with MRSA*.

If you’ve never heard the show before, I’d really recommend hitting up the archive and starting at the beginning. One of my favorite episodes is #4, because I think it’s a perfect example of what makes this show so different from every other podcast. Not only do Shawn and Garrett mix the usual two-white-guys-talking-about-nonsense formula up with pre-written bits, but those bits are highly produced, involving work outside of the main recording session. That is so incredibly rare in the podcast world, you guys! Seriously, the joke theme songs in #4 are miles better than many actual theme songs for other podcasts.

(#4 also features an exchange -“Can you eat bullets?” “You can… You shouldn’t.”- that I found so hilarious I got it engraved on my first iPod. That’s either a sign of just how wonderful the show is or just insane I am about the things I like.)

Please listen to this show. I think you’ll like it. And then we can get together and talk about it, and about how great Shawn and Garrett are, and how they should do a shirtless podcast**.

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*Well, we’re pretty sure it’s MRSA.

**Reference to incredibly old bit from the show in question, because I’m obsessed oh wait did you figure that out already?

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Something tells me I won’t be sitting shiva over this particular loss.

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